As you go through life, some of the questions that you face almost all the time is “Who am I?” and “What am I going to be?”. Your entire life journey is trying to find yourself. I used to think I’d never find out who I was and what my purpose is, I used to be scared, used to think I’d never amount to much, but all that in the past year has started to change for me. Actually I’m still scared, as every step in life can be painful at times and you never know where the steps you take are going to lead you in the future. Whereas my worries in life were on a bigger scale just only a year ago, they almost don’t seem of great importance now. Today, I worry about the little things.. School work and studying, and not being able to have enough time to get it done, time management, and how I need to split my fun times and work times more efficiently. Sometimes I worry about other things, maybe how I need to find a new church and start going again, maybe I worry about when I’m finally going to get a full nights sleep and have nothing to worry about the next morning. These are all important issues, but it seems so less important to me now then before. I feel like somehow, no matter how stressful my life can be, which isn’t that busy, that I’ll get through it. In two years I’ll be graduating from college. In less than two months I’ll be 20. I’m an adult and soon things will completely change for me and some reason I feel everything will work out and I’ll be happy. There’s no reason to worry. As I’ve started to feel like I can be whatever person I want to be, I’ve paid more attention to other people in the same timeframe of their lives, like myself. Two of my friends just don’t seem to see the picture that they are going to turn out ok. They worry about things I once spent a great deal of time worrying about. They worry about never being loved, they worry about what people think of them, they worry about losing friendships, and they worry about themselves. I’ve tried to help them, one a little more in particular, and I’m told how this is “far worse” then what I’m experiencing. But is it? All the drama is things I once wrapped myself in daily. The difference is, I decided to change. I forced myself to be happier, forced myself to just accept that someday love will come my way when the time is right, forced myself to make new friends, and forced myself to stop thinking I wasn’t good enough. I’m not a perfect human being, I have my faults, but I know now that I am only what I make of myself, not what other people see of me. I wish the same reality could hit some of my friends. They have it no more bad in life than I do. I pray that something I can say or do will help them realize this.
Well, after I check some things out on the internet, and check email, etc. I’m going to look over my management notes. I have an essay test tomorrow. Tonight me and Nic, Josh, Mike, and Emily, went to see Bruce Almighty finally. It was a good movie. That’s it from me, have a great night and God Bless.