Trust and obey, for there’s no other way.
Posted by Lindsey | November 15, 2009 | 4 Comments
Hello, this is Lindsey! Scott has been sluggish in updating his blog, so I thought that I would give a whirl at it. I wanted to post an update about where we are at the process of bringing home our child, along with how God is working through the whole process.
We are currently going through the book Experiencing God during our Wednesday night Bible study. This book keeps revealing to me day after day about how lost I really am. I am so caught up in trying to make myself happy and content. I am realizing that there are two ways to live your life: God-centered or me-centered. Although I want to think of myself as this perfect Christian who has everything together and all the answers, I truly am not. I continually struggle with making decisions that only have my best interests in mind. I surrender some parts of my life to Christ, but I hold onto the majority of it. I really enjoyed this quote from the study:
No one can sum up all God is able to accomplish through one solitary life that is wholly yielded, adjusted, and obedient to Him!
I often wonder why God called Scott and I to such a task as adoption. I wonder how we actually heard His call amidst the mess that we (I) are. I also wonder how many other calls that I have missed because I was too focused on myself and the plans that I was trying to make for myself. I am overly thankful for God’s unconditional love and His grace that He would keep pursuing me after all the times that I have turned my back on Him. As I walk forward each step of every day, I have to ask myself, who am I yielding my life to: God, or myself? Who are you yielding your life to right now? Are you missing out on something that God is calling you to do because you are afraid that obedience will cost too much?
Scott and I are grateful for the people at NewLife who understood God’s focus on the orphans and who responded to what He was calling them to do. Through their actions, God was able to work in Scott and I’s lives. You never know what outcomes your actions are going to have, no matter how small they are. By being obedient, you could be the stepping stone to other Christian’s obedience. We are happy to announce that you will have the opportunity to be part of our story next Sunday, November 22nd. NewLife Community Church Canal Winchester will be hosting a Concert for Adoption at 6:30. During this concert you will enjoy a host of different musical talents and hear different couples from the church share how adoption has affected their lives and what you can do to help.
On our end of things, we are in the first part of our home study of preparing the paperwork. We need to gather all of the information before we meet with the social worker. We have sent in our requests for the child abuse registry reports, driving record histories, and medical statements. This week we will work on scheduling a class to become CPR certified, scheduling an appointment for the fire marshal to do an inspection, passing out the reference letters for our friends to complete, and getting a letter from our employer regarding our current jobs. We have an appointment tomorrow to get our fingerprints taken for the US government and we’ll get a second appointment for fingerprints for the home study. After those things get completed, we’ll meet with the home study provider and go through an interview. When the social worker has the required information, they will write their report.
I’ve also received some questions about the timeline. As far as we know right now, we will likely travel to the Ukraine in July to bring home our child. This could easily change, but it’s our best guess. After the home study gets approved, the US government will have three months to approve our I-600A. After the I-600A is approved, then we’ll start filling out our dossier paperwork. It’s important not to start this paperwork until the I-600A is approved because the dossier paperwork expires in 6 months. Once the dossier is done, we will send it to CWA and they will review it and have it translated. The translated dossier will be sent to the Ukraine for the government’s approval. In the past few months, they have been reviewing the paperwork and sending out a letter of invitation to travel to the prospective adoptive parents within 10 days of receiving the dossier!! Wow, ten days!! They will send us a letter with an appointment date usually 30 days out. We’ll then have a month to schedule our travel and the transition of coming home as parents.
Speaking of becoming parents, we are starting to make steps towards the change. There were a couple of times this past weekend when I’m sure that Scott’s heart skipped a beat. The first was when we assembled the crib and put the mattress in it. I’m sure he’s sad to see baby things taking over his computer/game room! The other thing that jolted us into reality was installing the car seat in our car. These are the main baby items that we have. They are required for our home study so that the social worker can ensure how safe they are.
So, that is where we are at. Throughout this whole process, I’m just learning to trust God more and more and to lean on His strength and not my own plans. It has been an enjoyable experience watching other people meet the needs that we have pop up. We do not consider this adoption solely as a means to expand our family. We feel like we are being obedient to God’s calling in rescuing a child from a life of loneliness and helplessness, since in reality, that is what Christ did when He died on the cross to save a mess like me and give me life more abundantly.
I will move ahead, bold and confident.
Posted by Scott | October 12, 2009 | 4 Comments
As Fall has come, and the summer has passed there has been a lot of interesting changes in our daily Christian walk. Lindsey and I have been very busy with our jobs lately and for awhile it felt like we were getting nothing done for our adoption. The first important steps have been completed for awhile, but there has definitely been some tasks that we have been yielding to make, simply because we have been overwhelmed by some decision making. In order to make this adoption work, we knew upfront that big changes in our life needed to take place. Some of the decisions we had been battling included how our careers would be affected, how we would pay for this adoption, how we would handle the transition next summer with childcare or no childcare, and more. We kept raising question after question, all at the same time leading us to doubt or worry of things that were out of our control. Quite frankly, we were getting out of control and we both were looking in the wrong direction for our answers.
Four weeks ago I remember going for a walk alone on a Sunday evening. I was just a little overwhelmed with all of the decisions that I had to make. I wasn’t happy with certain things going on in my life and I was angry. So after a twenty minute walk around our complex I came back and pulled out my bible and a new workbook we bought as a study guide for our Wednesday night Fellowship group. It had been decided a few weeks prior that after we finished The Truth Project, we would try something else different and use a study guide to aide our discussions each week, along with our Bible reading.
The workbook is called Experiencing God – Knowing and Doing the Will of God. I have never used any sort of workbook, guide, or Bible supplement as I have always had mixed feelings about them. However, I decided that I needed to give this one a chance. I realized that I am unable to hold myself up on my own even without a child. If I am to adopt a child, I need to strengthen my relationship with God. As I started reading the book for the first time, I read things that even at that moment made little sense to me. This wasn’t just a book about the Bible. It was a book that was teaching me how to have a love relationship with God and specifically how it is to be done and very candidly pointing out to me what I’ve been doing wrong.
I’ve realized just four weeks into the series that I do have it all wrong. I have brought so much stress into my life trying to live my life for myself and making all of these decisions on my own. Experiencing God helps you realize that your life is not your own, and all we are to do is be obedient to God and do His Will. It stops you from asking ‘What is God’s will for my life?”, to ask rather “What is God’s Will?”
Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that thanks to this study it has helped realign my priorities in life. I can’t get through this life without doing God’s will. Nothing else matters and the only way to do this is to have a loving relationship with Him. It is through only God’s strength that I will get through the trials in life and be able to adopt and care for a child next summer. If interested in this workbook, it focuses on these seven steps on how to experience God for yourself:
- God is always at work around you.
- God pursues a continuing love relationship with you that is real and personal.
- God invites you to become involved with Him in His work.
- God speaks by the Holy Spirit through the Bible, prayer, circumstances, and the church to reveal Himself, His purposes, and His ways.
- God’s invitation for you to work with Him always leads you to a crisis of belief that requires faith and action.
- You must make major adjustments in your life to join God in what He is doing.
- You come to know God by experience as you obey Him, and He accomplishes His work through you.
If you’re not a Christian these steps might not make much sense, so if you have any questions I’ll be happy to answer them to the best of my ability. Thanks to the change in pace with this study, I’m happy to say that Lindsey and I are back on track with the adoption. We have some issues we are worried about, but we have to have full faith that God will work all the issues out. This week we will be turning the application in to our home study provider and get the process started with the social worker. We’re also busy getting some materials together to turn in our I-600A form (with a big fee, of coarse) to the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services. I think we’re still on track for next summer. Once we get this paperwork turned in and start the home study we will be opening up a whole new bag of adoption fun. Can’t wait.
Positive Thoughts Continued.
Posted by Scott | September 9, 2009 | 2 Comments
Though I won’t share the entire context here on this blog, Lindsey did receive a reply back from 104.9 the River over the weekend in regards to this email she sent out. The reply didn’t come from David Emerson, but from Todd Stach, the program director of the station. In a nutshell, Todd explains that at The River the DJ’s try to use the songs they play as a “vertical” tool to point people towards Christ, and their actual conversations on air are used more as a “horizontal” tool to positively impact people. He continued to say that things INSIDE the station might have a different meaning OUTSIDE the station. Whatever, that means. Todd never really cleared up for us whether or not they consider themselves a Christian Radio station or just a family safe radio station with some nice uplifting songs mixed in.
As far as the River Positive Thought is concerned, Todd mentioned that it can be based on scripture or not based on scripture. Which honestly, I’ve heard very few examples of scripture being used on air. Just yesterday the positive thought was ‘A kind heart brings smiles” Yup, that’s really preaching Truth and giving listeners a dose of the Holy Spirit. However, with all that said it was interesting to hear the following Positive Thought air on the station today while I headed to work:
God is not a God of disorder but of peace. He wants you to know peace even in the midst of chaos – Lindsey from Columbus
Isn’t that interesting? See, about a week and half ago before Lindsey wrote The River her concerns, she had sent on a few “Positive Thoughts” to the radio station that were actual Bible versus. No explanation was sent to the station other than that. She just wanted to see if the River would actually quote scripture as a Positive Thought of the Day. Besides, having a daily dose of scripture on a Christian radio station makes more sense than knowing that “a kind heart brings smiles’. Well, the verse Lindsey sent the radio station was this:
For God is not a God of disorder but of peace. – I Corinthians 14:33
Wait a minute.. did 104.9 The River just paraphrase Scripture from the Bible and give Lindsey credit rather than where credit is due? Honestly! Why are we disguising God’s Word like this? Though I do appreciate the effort, this just goes to show that The River is becoming another medium that is afraid of offending people by outwardly speaking the Truth. At our Wednesday night bible study we just finished a series by Focus on the Family called The Truth Project. I highly suggest you check it out. Anyway, one of the segments discusses how little by little God is being removed from our school systems and in our government. With this case, it just goes to show that even a Christian radio station is afraid to hold onto its own Christian values in an effort to not offend people who might not want to blatantly hear the Truth.
Why are we so scared of offending people? As Christians we need to stand firm and just lay it out there. We know what we speak is the Truth. Offending people should be the least of our worries. People need to hear it, and if it offends someone so be it. In retrospect, it’s ok though to air half the crap we see on late night cable and television. It doesn’t make any sense to me.
I will say this. I do enjoy listening to The River, and for the time being will continue to do so. But it’s really bothering me that this world has come to such a point where even Christian radio stations are now deciding to focus on this “horizontal” view to point people to Christ. There’s no need to be transparent.
If you really believe what you believe, preach it. Don’t sugar coat it. There’s my positive thought for the day.
Here’s our River Positive Thought..
Posted by Lindsey | September 5, 2009 | 1 Comment
On 104.9 The River you will hear “Positive Thoughts” daily which include quotes from listeners like “Share a fact and you touch a mind. Share a story and you touch a soul.” or “love is a verb, and so is forgiveness”. Some of which make little sense or have no practical Truth in them. Here’s an email Lindsey sent out to the radio station:
Hello David,
I think you are a really cool guy. I enjoy listening to you on the River and to the songs that the station plays. Recently I have been a part of the Bible study, The Truth Project which is produced by Focus on the Family. This study opened my eyes up to how our world, government, family, community, and basically, every aspect of our lives is based on Truth. The Truth being the Word of God. I have a whole new outlook on everything that is around me. Either something is Truth, or it is not. And the things that are not Truth are worthless and will soon pass away like the wind. Truth will reign forever and everything done with that basis of Truth will never go away.
This new outlook I have on Truth in our world has caused some discontent within me about The River. I came to this radio station with the expectation of receiving Truth through the words that are spoken. I’m disappointed that the station has committed to giving the listeners The River Positive Thought everyday, but has not committed to reading the words of Scripture everyday on air. As I stated earlier, words that are not Truth will pass away like the wind, but Truth will last forever. So, I think my misconception is whether The River classifies itself as a Christian radio station or as a positive station. I’ve tried looking on the website and listening to the other DJs and I realize that the station doesn’t specifically call itself Christian. I do not intend for this email to be negative, I think I would just like some clarification so that I can know what to expect.
If, indeed, The River is just a positive station, then I’d like to encourage you to keep on being positive. If The River is a Christian station, then I would like to encourage you to speak the Truth and not to be ashamed of it because those are the words that are going to last forever.
Praying for you and The River,
Lindsey Howell
Bloop, Bloop!
And so the paperwork begins..
Posted by Scott | August 30, 2009 | No Comments
The first big fee is paid, and we are now a client of Christian World Adoption. The reality of what Lindsey and I are undertaking is starting to hit us, though I think it will take a bit longer for it to fully sink in. Shortly after we announced we were adopting we filled out the initial application, which followed by a bigger application, and we participated in an orientation webinar. However, now the real fun starts. Our contract with the agency has been filled out and we’ll be in touch with our Case Manager later this week. She will be our contact person throughout this entire process for this Ukraine adoption. In the mean time CWA has sent us about a dozen emails and a book called “Adoption Parenting” that we will start reading soon. (And yup, there’s a quiz at the end).
Tonight we started filling out some forms for the UCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services). Even though we are not close to the actual dossier, as you can see below, we are definitely paper pregnant.
The biggest thing we need to focus on this week will be finding a Home Study provider. A home study is an interview process that takes about six months to complete with a social worker. We don’t have one yet, though I think we’re going to look into whoever Pastor Craig went with. Tonight we also tried to schedule out how we plan on completing all of the training that the agency requires.
That’s about it for now. We don’t have our foot completely in the water yet, but we’ll be diving in any moment now!
Put your shoes on and make yourself uncomfortable.
Posted by Scott | August 16, 2009 | No Comments
I came to the realization the other day that my greatest sin of all is not the most obvious. It’s not so much what I do, but lack thereof. This is called sin of omission. I probably have felt more guilt, sorrow, and anger at myself at this type of sin than the more obvious kinds. I’m not saying I don’t sin in other areas. I do, and on a regular basis. However, I have found that in the recent years of drawing closer to my relationship with Jesus, that I’m not as caught up in the most typical areas of temptation. The devil, being the clever guy that he is has found a far more unique way to grab a hold of me. I find myself in this weird spot where I feel as if God has set a new standard for my way of living. See, the cat’s out of the bag. Everyone reading this knows I love Jesus; that I believe he is the truth, the way, the light and so on. But – even though I might sin less in certain areas before coming to Christ, I now sin each and every time I decide not to glorify His name in public or strengthen my own relationship with Him.
Please believe it. I’m not perfect. I know there has been plenty of “God talk’ on this blog by me in recent weeks and that a lot of my readers outside of my church family might think I’ve gone off the deep end by answering a call to adopt an orphan from the Ukraine. I realize that my recent posts might make you uncomfortable and you’re not sure how to handle them or what to say. That’s okay, it excites me. But as you read on I do ask that you not label me as one of those “Good Christians”. It is far from the truth.
I have been more transparent lately with my faith, but my sin of omission and sin in general makes me no better than anybody reading this, wherever you are in your walk with God. We’re probably alike in more ways than none. For starters, do you read the Bible on a daily basis? Honestly, ask yourself that question and answer it to yourself. It’s great if you answered yes, but if you answered no, you are not alone. I rarely dive into the Word on my own. I start and it lasts for maybe a few weeks but I’m back to where I began and I end up spending my evenings watching TV or playing video games. I’m not saying this to discourage you from getting yourself closer to God. I just want to make the point that even us Christians sin. But the difference from me and the non believer is that I refuse to keep letting my sin stop me from living my life and for His glory. I will sin until the day that I die, but at least I know that my sins were paid for on the cross and that even though I’m not perfect, that as long as I’ve accepted Him and confess these sins, that my life has purpose and that there are far more greater things out there than living on this planet and going through the motions. What is stopping you and your walk? What are you most afraid of? What do you have to lose? Honestly.
I pray tonight that God will give me the strength to go outside of my comfort zone and speak up at work about my faith when opportunities are presented, that I speak the truth to strangers when the time arises, and that I don’t conform and say nothing when the Lord’s name is taken in vain. These are my sins and I get nervous that if I don’t work on them I’ll only draw people further away from the truth.
As a Christian, this is our responsibility. Pray that I will take it more seriously.
Answering His Call. We have an Announcement..
Posted by Scott | August 7, 2009 | 6 Comments
It is with much excitement tonight that Lindsey and I feel it is time to take an opportunity to share in detail what God has been doing in our lives this summer. To say we saw the changes coming would probably be a lie. Not even a month ago did I fully understand what He had in store for us. However, we can confidently conclude with full faith that we believe God is in control and with Him all things are possible. If interested, I invite you to read ahead about the journey we have taken this summer and learn about what God has called us to.
Rid me of myself, I belong to You.
Posted by Scott | July 25, 2009 | No Comments
What a trying week this has been. But I promise that it hasn’t been all bad. A lot of good is happening in our lives right now. I probably got a little carried away when I twittered that I was at a breaking point. In fact, in all actuality, nothing but good is surfacing. It’s just that when God tugs on your heart to make changes, it’s so easy to focus on the negative. The fact that I don’t focus on the positive is just because of trust issues I have being misguided that He will let me fall. And we all know that is not the case. I guess it’s just easier said than done.
A lot of interesting things have been playing out since I started blogging again. I had no intention of big changes in my life taking place two weeks ago when I started writing. I thought then that it would just be “nice” and very “Christian” of me to share God’s word. Now that I have began writing, He has started revealing so much to us during this time. It is so exciting that I will soon be able to outline what these changes are on such an open platform as this. God is doing great things in our lives right now and I hope if nothing else that the stories shared here will touch people and get people as excited for Jesus as we are right now! We are just inches from making the jump.
Now to drastically change the subject, I did want to share that today I got my first pair of glasses. I can now see in crisp 1080p when I’m sitting at the computer or reading a book. Here’s the stud muffin himself:
I haven’t decided if I’ll wear these outside of the house much, but here you have it – say hello to Mr. Four Eyes himself! The glasses are very plain, but that’s just how I wanted them. With that, it’s time to clean this apartment up a bit, as we are headed to the Ohio Theater tonight to watch the film “Show Boat” as part of their CAPA summer movie series. The memories of my performance as Captain Andy in high school are coming back..
Enjoy the weekend!
You’re up to something bigger than me.
Posted by Scott | July 19, 2009 | 3 Comments
A few days ago I celebrated my 26th birthday. Twenty six is not a huge milestone in some respects, but it was my first birthday as a married man. Overall the birthday went well. I selfishly decided not to tell anybody at work as I don’t enjoy all the pomp and circumstance that comes with all of that. Lindsey did meet me for lunch and later that evening we had the delicious cake pictured above at LifeGroup. The festivities concluded the following evening at my parents where we went out for dinner. Fun times were had all around.
With every birthday that comes and goes it’s a quick chance to look back at your life and also take a glimpse of what the future might hold. For us, I think the future holds many great things. As the subject of this post reads, we (being Lindsey & I) have strongly put forth this notion to listen to God’s calling and live out our lives for Him and not for ourselves. In my last post I really stressed the impact certain decisions or lack thereof is affecting us in our daily lives. The biggest challenge that has been getting in the way is our focus being so much on ourselves and figuring out our game plan for life. We have felt for so long that we need to be in complete control and set a definite timeline for how we want things to work out. It has become so important for us that all of our goose eggs are in a row before we make any other decision. God is challenging us in these areas by telling us to throw it all away and to stop worrying. We just need to live our lives with our sole focus being Him and believing that He will provide.
It’s quite challenging and sometimes frightening. Actually trusting God is a huge step in faith. We can go to church every week and read the Bible daily, but it means nothing when you’ve reached a point where you are being tested and you can’t take that extra step that reaffirms your faith. Do you really believe? If you did, you would think it wouldn’t be so difficult.
We’re getting there. I hope we can make the jump.
If He Called, Would You Listen?
Posted by Scott | July 13, 2009 | No Comments
I’m trying to understand today why sometimes it is hard for myself to make certain decisions in my life that I know are right (even ones I think I’m being called to), yet I choose to make no decision at all. Nothing positive ever comes out of my non-action. I just sit around wondering what could have been and how terrible off I am by not making the decision I chose not to make in the first place. By not making the decision I remain in some strange pseudo-state of comfortableness because I’m not having to deal with the positive or negative impacts of the future decision.
It’s quite a common problem for me. I freak out about the unknown sometimes and would rather mope around than make a change. Why I continue in such a cycle is beyond me as it’s such a frustrating way to live. I’m making some strives in these areas though as I realize that if I really want my life to mean anything more than ordinary, I need to stop this ridiculous habit. Lindsey likes to remind me, “If you aren’t going to do anything about it, you’re not allowed to talk about it”.
I hate not talking about it. That’s worse than not making the decision. So usually I give in eventually, but usually at a loss of some sort of opportunity big or small. What is this feeling? Is it my laziness? Is it actually sin? Maybe it’s my own selfishness of enjoying the self-pity I try to draw from my own wife.
Mostly it’s fear of change. I pray tonight that God helps me get over this problem because I need to start making some big decisions at some point – the kind you just can’t run away from. They’ll catch up with you eventually.
Do you suffer from the same problem as I do? Post here and let me know.